The Republicans had a "Contract with America" in 1994, and America trusted them.
But as soon as we turned everything over to them, they broke that contract and, over the following decade and a half, proceeded to drive us off a cliff and into the worst economic collapse this country has seen since the Great Depression.
Their "Contract" cost over 10 million Americans their homes, their jobs, and their life savings.
But NOW they say they have a "BRAND NEW" Contract with America -- and this time they say it's better than their last "contract" because this time they really, REALLY mean it.
And to prove to you that this time they're REALLY telling the truth, I present you with this hilarious clip from Thursday's Jon Stewart show (the fun part begins at 1:23, but the killer is John Boehner at 2:52):
What else can I say? Except that I want to add a clause to their contract that says if Americans are stupid enough to fall for it twice -- and they screw us all over again -- we get to strap all of them into electric chairs and collectively pull the switch. Now, that's a contract even I might be willing to sign!